For the week beginning Sunday 29 April 2001

Ambitious for love

When John, the disciple whom Jesus loved, recognised Jesus first (because he loved him back), Peter impetuously jumped into the water to wade across to him first. Then he hesitated. He had a conscience. A few days before he had impetuously waded into the arresting posse in the Garden of Gethsemane, waving a sword, trying to be brave and failed. He failed spectacularly in the Courtyard of the High Priest, denying Jesus loudly and repeatedly. Peter is broken. He no longer has any faith in his good intentions. He knows he is unreliable. He knows he makes promises he cannot keep.. So he hesitates, and fusses over the boat to avoid having to say anything to his Master.

Jesus teaches him two things. First, the mission Jesus gives his followers depends not on their skill, but on their obedience to him. When they throw out their nets at his command they are more successful than they could have dreamed. John records that there were 153 fish, and no small ones. There is no symbolism here. It is the sort of thing fishermen remember.

Second, we accept the mission not because we think we are going to be good at it, or confident about it, but because we have been healed by Jesus. And in our love and gratitude we will not refuse him anything. “Tend my sheep,” says the Lord. “Feed my lambs.” And as weak and unreliable people, who have no idea how to bring the world to believe the gospel, we do it. And our yes always sounds like: ‘Lord, you know I love you...’ Forgiven sinners are the best servants of Christ.

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